I wanted to call this blog “How to remain a hopeless romantic in a ________ world,” …….  so I searched all over to find a word that was the polar opposite of romantic, and couldn’t find one.  But with some research I found something interesting disturbing.

Romantic (noun) – someone who romanticizes, treats as idealized, a soulful or amorous idealist (one definition even said LIAR!)

Realist (noun) – a person who who accepts things as they are, accurate representation, not in an idealized or romantic style

Hmmmm… and what is an Ideal? –  a conception of something in its absolute perfection, an ultimate object of endeavor; a goal.

Ok vocabulary lesson behind us  —  I will admit to being a hopeless hopeful romantic.  I want that love you see in the movies (but then again, I also want those superpowers you see in movies……… )  So am I just a dreamer?   I mean, am I just as likely to shoot lasers from my eyes as I am to get the HEA (Happily Ever After)?


My existence is based on romance.  It’s kinda crazy, b/c I am a very logical person, but statistically speaking, my career choice isn’t very realistic. To be an artist in our society is an alternative lifestyle.  I romanticize my world.  In my mind, I can touch people and leave a mark to fulfill my purpose.  Lofty goals to be certain, but isn’t some of the greatest art someone’s vision and ideals manifest?  Actually, not settling for reality is what brings forth innovation.  Wouldn’t a realist say, “You can’t walk on the moon,”  “You can’t transmit pictures and speech through the air,” etc…?

We are born romantic.  If you ask a child what they want to be when they grow up they say things like  “A Fireman, A Superhero, The President”  and then…… certain “realities” set in and lower their expectations.   That child saw potential in his/her future – they had ideals.  So after some disappointments we lower our expectations — even in love.  How often have you heard someone talk about their “must have” list, only to settle for  “would be nice” and very often, “better than being alone.”  All the while the bar is constantly lowered – to the point we can practically walk over it.

Check out this amazing scene from the movie “500 Days of Summer” where they show a split screen of the main characters Expectations VS. Reality.  I think it illustrates it best.


So to my original question – “How to remain a hopeless romantic in a realistic world?” – I say never settle – color outside of the lines if you are so inclined.  It can make for interesting art and life.

Without romance I’m out of a jobDarien